I know there are many of us who have probably seen a few videos out there of parents punishing their children for using social media in the wrong way. For instance, putting that your nineteen on facebook when you’re actually thirteen, and talking like you know how to please a man. Also, kids have been getting punished for bullying classmates at schools or even on social media. These are just a few main reasons for these social media punishments. Now, on some of these I do agree with what the parents are trying to accomplish, but there are some videos where it is questionable about how the parents are handling the situations. I’m not a parent so I am probably stepping into unknown territory that I should probably avoid.
I just watched two different videos of this kind of material, while one of the ways, I agreed with. The other I didn’t. I’m not going to post these videos because I’m not here to promote it. I’m here to just see what you guys think.
One video had a father making his son work at his landscaping job for two weeks because his son was bullying a child in school. He even made his kid do twenty push ups every morning and run laps as punishment. He also had his son make a formal apology in front of his class to the girl he was bullying. Now, in some ways I do agree with this technique because it’ll show the kid respect. Show him that if he wants respect from anyone, he needs to earn it by treating others like he’d want to be treated.
Hold that thought. I’m going to throw in what my dad did when I was a rowdy kid at a ripe young age of four or five I believe. I can’t remember how old really, but it was around that age. Anyways, I was at a restaurant with my mom, dad, and sister. It was a nice restaurant and very quiet. Well, I decided to scream and holler because I didn’t get what I wanted. I can’t remember what it was, but I just continued to scream like a kid would do at that age. So, my dad took me to the bathroom and as soon as the door shut behind him he spanked me a good few times. He told me to be good and not scream because I can’t always get what I want. He also waited a bit for me to let out my tears and told me that if I wasn’t good, we’d be back in the bathroom again. Well, I definitely was not in the mood to have that burning pain on my butt cheek all night so I kept my mouth shut and acted civil the rest of the night. Ever since then I realized that getting in trouble is bad, and when dad says, “Do you want to go back to the bathroom?” I’d keep my mouth shut and shake my head.
If you discipline your kids at a young age and keep an eye out on them, most can turn out to be good kids. I mean, I’m twenty-six and thankfully never ended up behind bars or been in trouble with the law. I guess every one has their own way, but the old fashion smack to the butt seemed to set me straight for the rest of my life.
Going back to the second video I watched tonight, a mother posted herself yelling at her daughter about writing she was nineteen on facebook. (She was actually thirteen years old). She was talking to older men and said she was a “Freak.” Also, she claimed to have lingerie and different exotic clothing to wear for any men that wanted to be with her. She also stated her daughter’s first and last name which I think is odd because predators are on the prowl on social media all the time.
What I didn’t like about the video though was a few gestures her mother said to her daughter. One big one was about her being to young to be able to “wipe herself good.” Okay, I really don’t think we need to know that much. It’s tacky and gross. If you’re going to punish your kid, don’t humiliate them with tacky stuff like that. Just say what they did and state what you’re going to do to punish them, whether it’s ground them, spank them, or take away their privileges.
Now, my question is, what is the goal? Why do parents do this? Is it to make other parents aware of what happens on social media? Is it to humiliate your kid enough to the point where they avoid the internet all together? Whatever it may be, just make sure it’s done in a tasteful way. (No butt wiping talk.) I just feel like everyone stresses the importance of kids not bullying each other but isn’t this another way of bullying? Why does a kid’s punishment need to be sent out to others to see? Is it for the parent’s reassurance that they are doing the right thing? Or are they just wanting attention, or their five minutes of fame?
I went to this mother’s facebook page and her video shot up to over ten million views. In my opinion, that’s stardom right there. Then, I scrolled through her statuses. (It was a facebook stalking kind of night.) I saw multiple statuses talking about how she has reached 5,000 friends and can’t add anyone else. Everyone was praising her and reassuring her that she was doing a good thing. Some people were shaming her and making her feel down about her punishment strategy. Maybe she didn’t expect this many people to notice her video, but now, it’s like she’s thirsting for more attention.
I know I was brought up the old fashion way of discipline and I am very thankful for it. My parents molded me into the man I am today by giving me the knowledge and punishment of what’s out there in the world. They never posted anything like this cause it didn’t exist then, but why show it to the world? What purpose does someone have to show how they punish their kids?
I’m not trying to say what these parents are doing is right or wrong, I just wish if they’re going to do something like this make sure you don’t go over the fine line of classy and tacky. What’s your thoughts on this? Do you think it’s appropriate to film your kids punishment, or should it be in the privacy of your home?
I guess it kind of depends on the kid. Some kids you can only get through to them by publicly embarrassing them if punishing them behind closed doors doesn’t work. Coaching 10 year olds, I have noticed something like this. One kid after you tell him to stop and be serious about it, he stops and doesn’t do it again. Another kid, I would have to call him out then make him run a few laps until he finally got that I wasn’t joking around.
I was raised with being spanked with the belt and I grew up fine. I also think that it’s a new age and technology is becoming a huge part of everyone’s life. Most kids over the age of 13 have some kind of electronic device. I am the type of person who would rather keep their family issues behind closed doors and not out in the open.
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Yeah I understand that technology is a huge thing in people’s lives. I just don’t understand why some parents NEED to do this. Just gets old after a while.
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I tend to agree with you. I actually find all this facebook shaming to be really appalling. Families and kids deserve some privacy and what we’re doing just isn’t right. Parents try to shame their kids, but also husbands and wives try to shame each other, ex boyfriends and girlfriends retaliate against each other. I find the whole thing to be rather tacky.
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Yeah, facebook has turned into a place for stupid and annoying posts. I just think it’s parents who want attention that do this stuff
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I tend to think of punishment as being fairly instantaneous and not thought out enough to get a camera and film it. The first child caught bullying deserved some punishment and some lessons to set him right. I see nothing wrong with a little spanking and the full apology to the girl in question. But what’s the point of the filming, to teach other parents what to do? That’s arrogance to think you’re the only one who knows how. Many parents approach the problem differently but with as much success.
The mother is another issue. The girl is guilt of gross stupidity and maybe the mother should make her daughter watch films about the predators out there and what they can do.Maybe she should look at herself and ask where the child might have learned any of these things she speaks about and maybe gets rid of any copies of 50 Shades of Grey she was reading and leaving lying about. I’m not sure a punishment and embarrassing the girl is better than teaching her what can happen to children caught by a predator.
I believe that a little corporal punishment towards children helps teach boundaries. In my country I’d probably be outvoted on that since it’s illegal to use force like that here now. A shame, because I received it and grew up a lot more considerate of others than younger people are now.
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Yeah I don’t understand why some parents feel they need to teach other parents how to discipline their kids. I thought most parents shamed people for doing that anyways. I don’t know I just think the social media punishment is getting a bit nuts.
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I agree with you William that a good spanking sets kids straight at a young age. It did for my brothers and I. These days if you lay a hand on your children they call social services on you. That is a major problem in society as far as I am concerned. I have a ten year old son and when he throws a tantrum and acts like a 2 year old, it is all I can do not to “give him something to cry about” as I was raised. Not that I endorse abusing children at all. Just that a properly administered spanking would do a world of good for a lot of kids (and some parents I have met too).
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