Battles With My Brain

I was talking to my fiance last night before we drifted off to sleep. This was after the long day of work and trying to mount a television on my sister’s wall. A long day with many profanities that seemed to be endless. Anyways, it’s funny how lately I’ve been trying to avoid new ideas for a new novel. Why!? Oh, Why would I ever want to do that?!

Here’s my issue right now. I’m battling with my brain on how to finish a story fast with quality, but here’s the problem, I keep wandering off to new ideas for different stories? I’m sure many writers have this problem, but I’m, in a way, rioting against my brain. I’m avoiding the temptation to write something else, but last night my fiance came up with an awesome idea for a story, but I don’t want to jump into it yet.

My computer had about twenty different chapters to twenty different stories that I’ve written. All of them I want to dig into, but I always find myself wandering to another story that I promise I’ll finish. It just never happens because I’m lazy and can’t write longer than ten hours a day for four days a week. If you ask me why not? It’s because I’m lazy, I procrastinate, and after work I usually end up sleeping. When I wake up, it’s late and I have to be at work early the next morning.

I had an idea though. What if I wrote 3,000 words for two to three different stories a day for a year. Better yet 1,000. Instead of writing on just one, work on three different ones a day. That would lead to 365,000 words a year. That’s a decent amount of written stories. Here’s my issue though, my organizing and memory suck! How do I sit down and remember what I wrote for each story?

I’ve learned something else about myself recently. I write about myself way too much. I feel like I hog this little bit of space each week, while every one else has something better to say. Then, I start writing about how I could wish to want to care about someone else’s writing when actually I hope for others to come read my page.

I think I’ve run into about five or six pages out of the 1,067 I have that I actually read consistently. All the reblogs I do are the blogs I read a lot. Here’s my issue though, I’ll go to blogs, like and comment their posts and even have nice discussions. Then, when I get back to my page I’ll get a like but no comment. So sometimes I get a little irritated, especially when it’s the same person liking every post, but no words to my posts. It’s like ordering a cheese burger and receiving it without the meat. Now it’s a damn boring grilled cheese. I know I sound selfish and I will be criticized for it, but we all feel it, right?

You can’t deny when you see my name liking every one of your posts, but I don’t say my opinion or reblog, don’t you get a little irritated? Everyone has selfishness in them to write just about them and only wants the approval from their fellow bloggers. Do you think anyone really cares about what you say? Probably not, but if that’s the case, what do you do to fix that problem? Every blog has it’s own uniqueness unless you plagiarize then you’re just an inconsiderate asshole.

I’m going to say I use to not write for followers, likes, or comments, but in reality, who doesn’t want their voice to be heard. If you feel that highly of yourself that you can say, I only follow those who interest me, then you’re in the wrong place. I know following spurts have actually helped me find new and interesting blogs. It has helped me learn about readers that actually like my work. I think I shed a few tears on multiple pages because they had problems in their life that they couldn’t see any resolution to.

Okay, I’m rambling now. I’m just pointing out the things bouncing in my brain right now. I know I jumped into two different subjects¬† sorry about that. I just want to say that we all are truly never writing for ourselves. You are writing for someone else and hoping to get some kind of feedback. Don’t be naive like I was from the beginning. I told my readers at the time, hey I don’t need thousands of followers, I just need the twenty I have, but I was very wrong. All the blogs I follow now really molded me into a better writer and reader.

Let me know how you feel about anything on here. Especially if you have any ideas on how to focus on one subject in writing a story.